Young people who cannot attend school due to severe anxiety require time and flexibility.
A six minute read
When it comes to education, health and care, time is the thing we could all do with most for the benefit of the children we work with. I say with confidence that time is the thing that has been a barrier to progress in every tricky panel, appeal, appraisal, review, meeting, assessment, deadline, quandary and parents evening I’ve attended.
“Alongside expectations in statutory attendance guidance, partnerships should consider how families with severely absent pupils are factored into local eligibility decisions.”
Emotionally Based School Non-Attendance
Although unintentional, we professionals often put the barrier of time up against learning - Have you ever heard one of your struggling SEND learners say they don’t have time for your intervention, support, attention or a chat about what happened there? (Actually, I do remember one of my greatest drama students once telling me he didn’t have time to have a restorative conversation at break, he was too busy learning lines for the play I was directing him in. Which was wonderful.)
Timetables, budgets, workload, commitments, health, responsibilities, events, decisions, resources, are all things which limit the time us key adults can give to our young people. There is often a choice with time though, in one small form or another, if we are willing to seek it out. It really doesn’t have to cost a lot and it costs a lot more when we choose not to find it.
Flexibility often lacks in education, health and care and we blame that on policies, procedures, schedules, expectations, choice, ethos, rules, legacy, the boss, the diary… However, it is the lack of flexibility (or lack of will to try it on for size), that often leads our young people into difficult situations which aren’t of their own making.
The situation is beyond the child’s control because we created it and we control it. Then when the child can’t control a situation we created, we are surprised. We set our learners up to fail then deliver the sanction when they fail. Bonkers.
“If we’re being very honest, a lot of the time when adults say ‘No’, what they really mean is, ‘I don’t know’. ”
Fait accompli. The system default is NO.
I’ve been speaking with leaders, families and learners about what would make their SEND learning journey most productive and successful. The answer is TIME and FLEXIBILITY.
At our recent open events, we were overwhelmed by the experiences reported by parents and carers at a loss with their child’s inability to attend school due to anxiety, and the lack of access to support that would facilitate their re-engagement with education. There is limited flexibility when it comes to making the places young people with anxiety and/or SEND can get to. We professionals blame the system, it’s messed up on so many levels, yet are we at risk of supporting the longevity of that messed-up system, by blaming long wait times and complex referral processes for our reluctance to at least get the paperwork together and get the ball rolling. Is the slow and complex SEND system a convenient factor at times, because it discourages parents and carers from asking us for our own time and flexibility where their child is concerned? The system is the scapegoat - some recent contrasting examples:
I had the pleasure of spending time at a neighbour non-selective independent school where leaders and staff are keen to explore how best to provide their anxious SEND children with time and flexibility to maximise the chances of inclusion for everyone. It was a wonderful place to be, ethos to be welcomed into and a setting where the priority for everyone was to belong and help others to belong too. This school is developing a flexi-timetable approach to learning for a small group of anxious SEND students so that they can get through the door somewhere small and therapeutic now, and prepare for a gradual soft-landing back into their home school later.
A behaviour lead doesn’t know about flexible approaches to learning for an EBSNA child with attendance at 51%, because they’ve not looked into it before. Yet they say ‘No’ to discussing flexi-timetabling because, ‘We just don’t do that’. They don’t know why, if it’s still the case or if this is something worth exploring. The child has not attended school consistently since March due to EBSNA and they cry and vomit each time they attend, but mum is told they have not missed enough yet, to trigger her request for help from outside partners. The attendance policy will wait until attendance drops below 50% because that’s when the inclusion panel can refer externally. Another few months of learning lost in the meantime, and this school is spending a lot more than £75 a pop issuing absence fines which mum cannot pay and is frightened by. So now this family are unhappy, unwell, frightened and feel they don’t belong at their school. Their inclusion panel only includes those who are ‘severely absent’.
A service leader said yes to a EBSNA child who everyone else said no to (mostly because their dad is upset and can be aggressive with professionals). Finding a way to create a hybrid package for the child so that they can begin to learn again, in ways which might not be convenient to the professionals but they are incredibly advantageous to the child who is 14 years old with a reading age of 7 due to so much missed learning. Learning missed due to anxiety and attainment gaps which were created by the adults is now being caught up on in imaginative ways, because someone said ‘let’s find the best way’ instead of ‘No’.
A Local Authority says ‘No thank you’ to the mediation offer proposed by an independent advisor, because their policy flowchart ‘goes straight to tribunal’ and the process doesn’t have a space for seeking mediation first'. ‘There is no box for mediation being preferred by the family I’m afraid miss, I hope you understand’. They just don’t do talking things through because cases are so high in number and increasing complexity that they can only follow the existing complaints procedure flowchart, because they know it well which ‘saves time in the long run’ [sic].
What does the government say about time and flexibility for children who are severely absent?
“Particular focus should be given by all partners to pupils who are absent from school more than they are present (those missing 50% or more of school). These severely absent pupils may find it more difficult to be in school or face bigger barriers to their regular attendance and as such are likely to need more intensive support across a range of partners. A concerted effort is therefore needed across all relevant services to prioritise them. All partners should work together to make this group the top priority for support – this may include specific support with attendance or a whole family plan, but it may also include consideration for an education, health and care plan or an alternative form of educational provision where necessary to overcome the barriers to being in school.” Working together to improve school attendance (DfE 2024)
“The number of children in home education has accelerated since the COVID-19 pandemic, with an estimated 111,7007 children believed to be home-educated in England as of October 2024, and a further 6,1568 believed to be home educated in Wales. The statistics show an increase in parents reporting that they are moving their children into home education due to mental health concerns or special educational needs/additional educational needs.” Children’s Wellbeing and Schools Bill (UK Parliament - March 2025 Policy Summary)
“Education and childcare settings are vital in understanding underlying causes of absence which can be indicators or causes of other issues. Live attendance data is therefore one of the best early-warning indicators of need, particularly where pupils are absent more often than they attend. Alongside expectations in statutory attendance guidance, partnerships should consider how families with severely absent pupils are factored into local eligibility decisions: if pupils face out-of-school barriers and the family do not have a social worker, they should routinely be assessed for Family Help;” Families First Partnership Programme (DfE 2025)
Why are we really saying ‘No’ to being flexible?
Can I ask you to think about a time when you said ‘No’ to a child and the outcome was negative. If we’re being very honest, a lot of the time adults say ‘No’ when what they actually mean is… ‘I don’t know’.
Now consider what the outcome might have been if instead you’d found a little wriggle room, flexibility and space for discussing options:
Is there a space for considering balance in place of a flat ‘No’ in your work for children and families?
What policy is it written into, and what would it be like to find the breathing spaces between the hard lines within that policy?
What would it be like to not say No or Yes, but to instead say ‘We’ll find the best way’.
